Chaos

Am C
3 min readMay 17, 2022

Growth happens in chaos.
Don’t run away from it. Sit with it. Listen to what it is telling. Listen to all the thoughts that are coming up, think, and understand. See what’s standing out. See what it’s trying to teach you.

It’s very hard. It’s not easy to sit with chaos. In fact, it’s the hardest thing I have ever felt. And I don’t know how to sit with it. I couldn’t run away from it. It gets worse if you run away from it. That’s why I learned to sit with it and try to understand what it’s trying to tell me.

If the message is delivered right, chaos disappears. Not forever. For a while. As we go on through various experiences in our lives, the chaos of different scales happens. It’s present in our everyday lives. The reason why we are not feeling its effect is, that we got so accustomed to it. To it means some kind of chaos that, we don’t even identify as chaos. It’s just part of our daily routine.

But shit hits the fan when something very wild happens out of the blue. Something which we never saw coming. Something which we never expected.

Everybody has gone through it. Everyone knows this feeling. Guess it’s part of the human experience. Getting born is the perfect example of this. From closed walls of the womb to the bright, shining, and chaotic outside world.

Even though we have gone through various kinds of chaotic experiences before, it hits hard. You can’t get familiar with it. But I feel like it’s what’s making us grow. Grow emotionally. There are lots of things to be learned from it. It will show you all the worst things and the best things and all the others things that may or may not happen. You don’t know which one is going to happen, and which path to choose. So you have to prepare for all, and at the same time thrive to make the best thing happen out of it. But the funny thing is you don’t even know whether what you think is the best outcome is actually the best thing or not. That much inconsistency and indecisiveness are present in the situation.

What should we do then? How should we embrace it rather than just run from it or do something else to distract ourselves from it?

We are in shock. Don’t know what to do… No idea how to navigate this… Thousands of thoughts flood your brain…the ever-thinking nonstopping brain keeps it on a loop. It keeps on giving you scenarios, ideas, and so forth and so on. Most of the time, it will just make the situation worse. The overthinking brain has a tendency to self-destruct itself.

Guess the best thing is to share the stuff with someone who listens.
What’s keeping us up, we should share with someone, and it will give us some clarity on what’s going on and what to do about it.

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Am C

hola. This is mostly just self talk. ig: @_amc.__